BP oil spill

It was a fail....that is all

Pickle fight

There once was a pickle that was so great he in slaved the in tire human race. He was so powerful with his crunchy greatness put every one into awe his dark green skin was hard as rock and his soft inside was magical and rad. His name was Crunchy. Crunchy had a vision of a pickle only world. It was a pickle Apocalypse. His army was great and green like coca cola lime. It was visible for many miles from eye to eye. His army strecthed from new york to japan. They all had little weapons stretching from guns to bombs. He inslaved them all in the year of 2010. Some escape but many had died and now where on the indangered speices list now. The people who survived faced the pickle empire but they knew it was useless. But there was a man who could save them....his name was John Farmer. He would lead the remaining froces into the heart of the pickle army. Crunchy was always on top of the Lady librety in her crown. He thought that the world was murder because of how the breed pickles shove them inot jars as babys just to be eaten. They launched miniture missles all over the place hittin everywhere but New York.

John Farmer new the only weakness to these pickles of war. He had to create a super weed killer. The humans didnt have much time the pickle armada was on the move toward there last hideout.....Mexico. Mexico was so suspicous that they decided to go there last. The army was very close to the boreder of Mexico and John farmer had just finished his super weed killer. The last remaining Humans ran out into the battle field spraying this super weed killer all over the pickles instantly all the pickles started to die. Then the humans took over again and that was the end.......or is it?

2028
The pickle empire has reapppeared.
They have reunited and have become invincibill to the super weed killer.
John Farmer is now 98 years old since the Greening.
They thought that the empire would never regroup and attck again.
They thought that they had wiped all the intelligent pickle.
They where wrong.

The pickle army had even more memebers and where more powerful then. They had been planning a counterattack from since they lost. They had created the bomb of all bombs. They made it out of pickle juice orange juice lemon juice and lime peels. Everything that was a fruit and made eyes sting was in this bomb. The remaining forces of humans rebuilt the planet and took the citys and countrys back over. The pickles hid in fear of being completely wiped out. Now it was the hunter who is the hunted. They hid under the citys in the sewers and if they come out of hiding it was to migrate. It was very easy for them to stay under cover. Afte they became amune to the super weed killer they gained the ability of camaflouge. If they hadnt the goverment would have wiped of the face of the planet. If they did that there wouldnt be the second comeing of the pickle empire.

(alarms going off)

John Farmer: there comeing weve got to sit up the barrier.
General of resistence: ok people prepare for the worse grab your weapons and be ready we dont know how powerful the enemy is since the last time we fought.
Resistence Troops: SIR!!!!

And the battle for mother earth went down in the pickle history Why pickle history you ask? because they won the race of humans where wiped of the planet and that was the end. Green day had happen... the end.

Why Tenacious d is the best band ever

Tenacious D is the best band ever here are some reason. There lead singer is Jack Black IT DOSENT GET MUCH BETTER THEN THAT! They write completely un serious songs that have nothing to do with the earth and life. They don't have any crappy love songs. They have a movie about there band DOES JUSTIN BIEBER HAVE A MOVIE ABOUT HIM??? I DIDNT THINK SO! There lead guitarist is Kyle Gass.......Awesome name awesome guitar player hes just plain awesome. The movie is just JB (Jack Black) and KG (Kyle Gass) pretty much trying to get an mystical guitar pick called the Pick of destiney. The pick of destiney gives whoever wheres it awesome guitar playing skill or really epic singing. Justin bieber dosent have it because he sucks.....really hard. So in the movie Tenacious D isnt that famous yet so they try to get te pick and become the most awesome band ever. But they dont know that the pick was actully made by the tooth of the devil. SPOILER in the end the Devil gets the pick back and trys to destroy the world. But Tenacious D challenge him to an epic rock off and they end up winning saveing the world. Could justin bieber save the world with his girly voice and crappy back up singing i dont think so! Tenacious D is ultimatly the best band ever. They make rap look like bed time storys . Tenacious D makes Techno sound like an elephant takeing a big honking....never mind. Tenacious D makes Country sound like..well any type of music makes country sound bad.
Tenacious D makes 60s hippies songs sound like a giant acid trip
Tenacious D makes the beetles sound like a begger on the street
Time to really piss people off
TENACIOUS D! MAKES HEDLEY!SOUND LIKE 9/11 CRASH WELL 300 HIPPIES CRY OVER DEAD TREES WELL JUSTIN BIEBER SINGS CRAPPY ONE TIME IN THE BACKGROUND WELL 40000 FAT DUDES TRY TO FIT INTO ONE TINY CAR.
Do you get the point people Tenacious D well never die.
The only band that is next to Tenacious D is Iron Maiden.......dont even get me started about them

THE ALLY

OOHH the awesome and great ally in my back yard. It was a hang out spot for me and my friends for like 7 years. Me and afew of my friends play back there and still hangout. well this story sucks im gonna make another one. THIS ONE DOSENT COUNT FOR HEART THINGY

Another random family story: Watching tenacious d in the pick of destiney

WARNING: that movie has an unbelievable amount of swears i recommend not watching.
It was a boreing friday night when my brother came bursting threw the front door with a new movie in his hand. It read on the cover Tenacious D in the pick of destiney. He was like "WE GOTTA WATCH THIS MOVIE GUYS SERIOUSLY!!!!!" so we hooked up the dvd player and put in the new movie. There was no credits intro just this. "......a long #$% $%^&*() time ago in a land called kickapoo there lived a humble family religious through and through. But yeah there was a black sheep who know what just to do. His name was young JB and refused to step in line a vision he did of !@#$%^& rocking all the time. He wrote a tasty jam all the planets did alighn" and the rest is just....well.......BAD!!!. My mom very much did not want me listening to that movie but i did anyway with my brother. He loved tenacious D and after tha movie they are now the best band ever. Better then anyone it dosent matter who you listen to tenacious D is the best band your gonna ever see in your intire live. Now im not telling you to go watch this movie you really shouldnt. But there still the best movie...ever. NO SERIOUSLY IF YOU OR ANYONE IN YOURF HOUSE DOSENT LIKE SWEARING DONT WATCH THIS MOVIE.

me mom brother.....and the evil field

It was a nice summer day when me and my brother wanted to go play some baseball. My mom then decided she wanted to come to so we all went down to this nasty field. It had sticks garbage it was just plain nasty nobody would ever play there but we would why would we play there? because where a family of crazy people. But anyway back to the story. I swear to good this field was out to hurt us. My brother pitched the ball i was batting i hit it and right into my moms face. Next thing to happen was my mom was pitching my brother was batting he hit the ball it way up into the air i was gonna catch it but i tripped over a log and scratched up my leg. And my brother ran into a fence. We just decided to leave after that. The field still sits there mocking me every day laughing like "MUHAHAHAHAHA YOU LL NEVER PLAY HERE " and i was like "O_o" well that's the story of the evil field that hurt everybody in my family and probably many other people HAHAHA. THE END. syupid spell check says MUHAHAHA and HAHAHA is wrong just ignore it AHAHAH

Where i grew up.

I grew up in a awesome but small town called westbank. My creepy neighbor to my left are some 80 year old hippies....just kidding there not hippies but there still creepy. She always trys to give me nasty candy and weird shirts. I always thought they where weird but there actully really nice and kind. But on my right theres a really nice person who i always talks to. My back yard is really small but its has a back alley. Its a narrow pathway but its sweet. It can get me to stores twice as fast which im usally go to everyday. Thats where my supplies of coca cola comes from. Yes i drink unhealthy ammounts of coca cola. In that field over there to the left and up from my house is one of are many hang out spots. Theres also hippies there so we stoped hanging out there but there was this little white couch and we stopped hanging there.... because we hate hippies.....stupid hipppies. The orchard was always fun. We would steel pears and run hopeing that the owner wouldnt come out mostly because he has a shotgun. Well theres not much to say about my neighbro hood. THE END

My Mom is better then your Mom

"My mom is better then your mom" billy said. "No shes isn't" i yelled. "Oh yeah my mom makes 100bucks a day!". "yeah right, well my mom fights bad guys of in the night" i said back. Then billy yelled "My mom saved the earth once". So i yelled "my mom is so awesome she saved the universe from a giant spaghetti. So shut your face". "HAHAHAHA I'm so sure there was a giant spaghetti monster" he said sarcastically. "There was and its meatballs of doom where crashing and destroying all the planets!" I screamed. Then billy said "My mom could that with one hand". So i said "Yeah well my mom is a MAStERMIND so shut your crappy face". He knew he had been beat theres nothing better then a MAStERMIND so he walked away in intense shame. I WON! the end........dont like it whatever.

MOHAWK KITTY!!!!!!!!!

My old kitty cat Jimpley was a very how you say insane. She had really long fur and i would makeitinto a mohawk on her head. she looked so cool. Whenever she had amohawk eveyone in the house would shreik MOHAWK KITTY!!!!!!!!!!!! from across the house. It was amazing. she was very crazy she wouldnt even care. She wasvery tolerent and she would never run unless you scared her well she was sleeping. She would fumble around and couldnt jump very high. My brother would always help her around the house. She could never jump down from high places.

walking to the bus

bI was strolling to the bus stop. When all of a sudden a massive black exaspertrated dog leaped from the bushs. He was unpredictable i think he was insane . He started to run he jumped again and plummetted face first into the ground. He was agetated by something i couldnt tell. He was flopping and barking asloud as a whale(somehow that makes sense to me) It was a symphony of pain and rage. He wasflourescent with pain. He jumped one last time and floped on the ground giveing up on whatever he was doing. I slowly walked over to the mighty beast slowlybeing very still. Amazingly the dog could talk. he said "little boy i have a thorn in louged my stomach can you help me remove it????" i pulledout the torn and wason myway to the bus. Myday was finally going back on track untell..... "BLABIBLO i tricked you!" I spoun around to see who said this. The dog was gone and only a man stood there. He lookedatme with and evil smile. I waswondering who this creppy man was had he been following me? He unpredictally trow razor sharp dog bonesat me. He punched an elephant ear and kicked at my face.

When a base ball hit me in the face

It was a Thursday and everyone was having a great time. Nobody was in a bad mood and it was Spencers turn to bat. OH i should mention who was playing. I was on short stop,Austin was back catcher, Evan was pitching, Coleton was 1st base Mathew was second Damon on 3rd and some kids i didn't know where out field . Evan pitched he ball it looked like a white ball of speed and power spinning towards Austin. It was a strike. It went right int his glove. Dust flew from the old dusty glove. He throw it again it was a ball. He pitched the ball again it was a hit. It was not very high of the ground coming right toward me. I thought i would be able to catch it but it started to go down. It drooped i was thinking that it was just gonna bounce right into my glove. I wanted to get Spencer out and get up to bat so bad. It hit the ground Spencer was half way to 1st base. It flew up just passed my glove and made its way to my face.

I was trying to make my glove move up but my hand wouldn't move. I tried and tried but it wouldn't budge. it was not even an inch away from my face now and Spencer was a quarter away from first base. Everything was in slow motion and i was preparing for the pain right before it hit me i saw the ball the dust all the bat marks thats when i closed my eyes and then. BLAM! The ball hit me right in the nose blood shout out right away. It didn't hurt that much but i was bleeding like crazy. I throw my glove of and grabbed my nose. Spencer was at second now. I didn't even think to pick up the ball. Evan called time and sent Spencer back. Evan told me to go to the washroom as i made my way there a river of blood made its way from my nose onto the ground. I started to run i finally made it. It felt lie forever but it only took me 30 seconds. I leaned over the sink as the blood went down the sink still bleeding after a minute I grabbed a tissue and shoved it in my nose. It stoped the bleeding but it 3 was just building up now. When i got back out there Spencer said he was sorry and we continued the game. This time i was in outfield. The game went on and we easily lost the game.

The next day my friend got a bat to his face it broke his glass's and gave him a bleeding nose. The glass went into his skin just above his eye. The day after that he came to school with stitches above his eye and new glass's.After that we where told to stop playing base ball at the school. We started doing football....but that's a different story. The day when Austin got hit theere was still blood on my glove and on te base ball we use. I thought that was pretty funny.

The life of a shoe.....SUCKS!!!!!!

We where walking along a dusty road i was coughing like crazy i was all dirty i wanted to take a bath but i couldnt because i was a shoe. "ARUGH! why did he have to take the long road home". "AAAWWW dont complain so much righty we'll be home soon...........as long as he dosent stop at the store first ". "ooooohhhh we all know hes going to". We went into the store still dirty from all the dust. "Lefty we use to be so nice and shiney and pretty before this evil child picked us up at the store". "Hes not that bad". We where all beat in up and weve only been with this kid for two weeks i meen where gonna die. "Lefty its raining again". "Yoir jokeing right....... AWWW LAME!!!". "After he buys those chips where going into the rain are you ready Lefty". "Im ready lets do this!!".

It bwas wet as the sea out here the puddles were deep and the mud was sticky. Id rather be dusty then covered in mud. He ran instead of walking home this made the impacts much worse the thumping and pounding. "ARRABBA HGHDY Lefty are you alright?". "Im ok just really wet and muddy". He was running up a dirty old hill he sliped and fell are faces dug into the mud to stop himfrom falling. He had it up the hill and past the tennis cort. "ARUGH! where almost there Lefty just hold on!". He ran through the dirty muddy wet old of raod as a short cut. He ran through the back yard not looking where he was going and hhe stepted in dog crap.

"Lefty where home are you alright?..........Lefty?...LEFTY!?!?". Lefty was dead he drowned under all that water and wet mud he stepted in. It got inside Lefty and he drowned in it. " Lefty im gonna miss you man. You where always there when i needed you and you where always tryin g to cheer me up. I just wish i was better to you.Im gonna miss you brother". "AAWWWWW Billly you wrecked your shoes we just bought those ones and they looked so good on you". "Oh sorry mom well just buy new ones". I was alone now....no friends.......i was in the garbage a useless pair of shoes no one wanted. Broken ripped cut. There was no need for me in this world. Nobody in this world would want a broken pair of shoes like us. The dump was are new destination i was acared it wasdirty and smelly and in the day the seagals attack the pices of old food and sometimes mistake us for food. Thhey sometimes pick at us and untie are laces. It was smelly and unpleasnt. In the night it was dark and the noises where weird the laping of the ocean near by motivatided me at night to fall asleep it calmed me down.

Then one day something differnt happened. I was pickedup throwin into a smaller pile of trash but it was in the back of a truck, Lefty wasnt in there. I was driven along the ocean for many hours. We finally came to some weird bay area. I was picked up with all the other trash and throwin into a big blue bin. It was a recycle station. We where being reused! it felt good to be all cleaned up and shipped out to some poor kid that needed a right shoe.

THE END

Scardy Student

WARNING: before reading this post please empty your trash bin run your anti virus restart and clean keyboard.
Scardy student is always scared. From dirty napkins to spiders. He does the same routine everyday.
1. Wake up
2. check for monsteres under bed
3. eat breakfest
4. Run to school bus
5. Try to live thru the rest of the day and get home A.S.A.P

Scaredy student has some very weird and un heard of fears. He has a fear of being dirty. He has a fear of meeting new people. Fear of his parents. Fear of chikens. Well he gets scared about almost everything. He has a fear of saying hello..... HOW IS THAT POSSSIBLE!!!! So doing anything for scaredy student gets him all mumbely and small. His parents tryed to put him in some scicology but he happens to be scard of that to. So they where gonna send him to an insane asylum but he happens to be scared of those as well. So there just gonna not intervder with him but he has a fear of doing things on his on. Hes always paranoid you could be talkin about cheese burgers and he'll be like WHATCA SAYIN ABOUT ME WILLLAAS!??!!??! He even has a fear of good wether and thats a good thing. Nobody knows his name if you ask him he'll pull out a random box and hide in it tell they leave him alone. If they dont he'll use his emergency phone and call thre police. know here his plan to save himself fromall the things hes scared of.
1. Wake up (6:00)
2. Put on protective armor (6:01)
3. Take 33498 baths (6:30)


4. Ungerm cereal (6:35)


5. Before going out side check all windows for spiders outside the house ( 7:01)
6. Go outside (7:30)


7 Spray germ spray where hes gonna step (7:30 - to whenever)
8. Do everything he would nrmally do and get home



He absoulotly hates halloween . Its the scaryist thing to scardey student. When halloween comes around on the calender he boxs himself up goes under his bed covers himself in sheets and sits there for the rest of the night or day.One time on halloween his mother locked scardey student out of his room. He cryed for hours then his father put him outside. Scardey student got so scared he was never scared of anything again. The next day the teacher asked himto ansewer a question and he answered it perfectly no problemsat all. Then people found out that his name really was Swedy Tod. Swedy Tod was actully very nice and was awesome. No body in the school hated him. He started a club for people with weird or un heard of fears. Although hes still very scared of aliens are going to steal him. That would scare me to. But there was a whole lot of down sides. No friends no food no life no pets no computers. But notrhing was worse then getting taken by aliens. Hereis his new day plan

1. Wake up
2.Get out of bed
3. Put on half of protective armor
4. take 1 Bath
5. Before going outside look put windows
6. go outside talk to friends
7.hang with friends
8. get home

Well thats the way scardy student lifed his life forever untellhe died.

THE END.

Random 4 (this one is about well i will let you guys to decide post comments about what you want me to wright on)

you decide!!!!

Driving youth story thing

I think people should start driving at the age of 15. I think that 16 or 18 is to long to wait and that 15 is the most resonable age in my opinion. If they are 15 they wont be out and drinking and other stuff like that. I believe that at 15 they should get there lerners permit or whatever. Than at 17 they should get there N. If there 16 they been waiting to long and are more excited and reckless when they first get there L.

People are angry if your not that old and your driving even when your at the legal age of 16 old drivers hate you. At 18 and your driving your more suposed to drink thats bad. If your 18 you could be out with friends doin bad stuff and gettin high and crap. Then your gettin behind the wheel and gettin tickets and crap. If your 15 you wont be gettin into that stuff. If your 15 limit of no tickets. After two years of experiance on the roads you shouldget your full drivers licensecens. 16 in my opinion is to long to wait for a n so 15 would be good.

The test would be harder for 15 year olds to make sure there ready. If there 18 it should be slightly easier than the 15 test. They shoul get there n at 15 then when there 17 they get the l and when there 20 they get there full license. If there to young like 14 theyll be crashin and wont be able to control the car. If there 15 they wont be able to afford super fast cars and really nice cars. If they get even one ticket when there 15 they get there license taken away and have to retake the test. If they have there L the limit to tickets should be about 3. In a video game theres a restart button but if you crash your car your dead and life dosent have a restart button. And if you get in to and accident and its yourfault license suspende for well it depends on how bad the crash was. If they kill someone in a crash they cant drive intell there 20 years old. I cant think of anything else to say soooo. I think that you should drive when your 15 cuz everyother age is to long to wait or to imature.

MAH BOI!

This is what i will become if you piss me off.... SO DONT DO IT!!!

Random 3

Heres a list of people that dont suck...... Megadeath, Mettalica, judis priest, soad ( system of a down) dope (not the drug the band) that band who plays carry on my wayward son, disturbed, AC LIGHTNING BOLT DC how could i forget. Anybody thats not justin bieber is pretty cool. MSI ( mindless self indulgence) iron maiden, dead or alive,the cult,pink floyd,fatty spins. If you dont know even one of these people are you have no taste in music im just sayin.

Random 2

Cowboy there pretty cool. Think about ridin around on a horse shooting a pistol up in to the air thats pretty cool. Cowboys seem to always show up at the right time. For example person tide to rail road tracks cowboy comes along at the last second and safes the person then tracks down bad guys throws im in jail, and the person gets really mad and has to stay in jail for a couple slow years. Cowboys like meat. They like bacon, they like beef jerky as well. In movies a cowboy falls of his horse in the western movies and dies. Then a cooler cowboy comes and saves the day how cool is that cowboys are awesome. They drink beer all night long and in the dusky morning they are out saving lifes. It would be awesome to be a cowboy you would be fames and really cool. In the movies then a cowboy saw another cowboy and they ate donuts bacon and bannas they were very hungary so they started to eat another donut. that donut tasted really good i liked it it had sprinkles on it and ooo i loved that donut and then after i was done i went to starbucks and had a coffee it was a vanilla. Since there are no cowboys now I would like to become a police man and eat doughnuts all day. Think about that wouldn't that be great eating doughnuts all day until I make a world record and hve to go on the show "half ton person" and I have to have an x-ray and then the x-ray people. Okay this is me talking now this is rely wierd.

random

Heres a list of people that suck. jonas brothers. justin whatever his name is that one time kid. green day. flo rida. every rapper in the world. nickle back. linkin park. slipknot. JUstin bieber justin bieber justin bieber justi bieber.... multiply by 100000000000 no but sreously that kid sucks so much i dont get how people can stand his voice. Hes fifteen and has the voice of a 10 year old girl he rely does suck. By the time hes eightteen hell be my sizes when i was thirtteen and look like some mutant girl cross thing like,COME ON PEOPLE HE SSSUUUCCCKKKSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Coca cola

Coca cola the best drink ever. If been drinking coke since i was 5. I love coke it sponsors the olympics it must be awesome. Coke you can almost find in any store go ahead and check. It has maney differnt flavours. Vanilla coke cherry coke black coke ( tastes like coffe)zero coke and blue coke ( very very hard to find discontinued ). Cola has a polar bear and penguins as there mascots thats awesome. Coke has many pack sizes. 6 pack 12 pack 2 litre small cans. The cans are red and where white at one time. Theres differnt types of can/bottles. Metal can metal bottle glass bottle miny cans and plastic bottle. coke has exsisited since 1886. There are many differnt types of can designs.Christmas cokes olypics cokes crazy coke can ( still have one). In 1993 the polar bear was put as the mascot in a video where there watching the northern lights. You can get coca cola poker chips on ebay. Coke was created by a man named Doctor John he made it in a kettle on the fire......... ya really. The name was suggested by Frank robinson. Back in 1905 there was small amounts of cocaine and caffine rich kola nut... funny name. The cocaine made it very addicting thats what made it the great drink today. Coca cola is found to be much better than pepsi and sprite ( imo).Root beer dosent even come close imo( in my opinion thats what it means if you didnt know). The taste is mostly vanilla extract and cinnamon extract....still its good. Pepsis taste comes from lime ornge and lemon. Coca cola came befor pepsi. Pepsi came out in 1940s ( they copied coke its just alittle sweeter). I get sick of pepsi in 0.36 seconds its that bad to me. We have to hit all pepsis with rocks that would be nice. Ok i think you guys get the point but i think i missed one flavour....... lime the best evar its so good. It was there best idea since.... umm well something. Its like BAM! the flavour wins. Pepsis got nothin on lime coke. But im not here to bash pepsi but they fail.... hardcore. Well i think im about done now.......hhhhmmm if you got something i missed ( about coke) post a comment PPPPLLLLZZZZ!!!!

SO GETTING THIS SHIRT!!!!!!!!

Sadness

As i came home from the store i was full of joy nothing in the world could upset me. Well except for what was up ahead. My house was on fire...... yeah not the best day of my life. I was full of sadness seconds earlier i felt like one of the happyest boys in the world... but now complete sadness. The tears in my eyes were complete and pure sadness. Not knowing if m parents were okay i started to cry my heart out. My dog my cat all my stuff could be gone. As i thought this the fire people showed up to save the day. But the house was almost completeley ingulfed in flames. It was almost unsafeble but somehow they pulled it off in about twenty minutes the fire was almost out. But were are my parents tears came back into my eyes i started to cry....... again. But then a cop car pulled up and my parents steped out i ran to them in joy happiness was back. what happened was a stove element was still on after goung to a movie. But i didnt care all i cared about was that my family was okay. THE END

Dont even try to tell me nothing happens when you divide by zero.

L4D.... yeah.

L4D my favorite game.... what? got a problem get the fudge out!!!
P.S L4D stands for left 4 dead....